Nine Reasons NOT to Attend Law School

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The Legal Geekery Blog presents 9 Reasons Not to Attend Law School. A highlight:

5. It’s Grammar School All Over Again

See if you can pick out any similarities:

  

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• First year, you don’t get to pick any of your classes or professors, it’s all assigned to you before you get there, and you have no way to transfer out
• You have a gi-normous backpack and carry around your books all the time
• The same people are in all of your classes, all day, every day
• Everyone calls you by your last name again
• There’s plenty of drama to be had
• Rumors (and worse, the truth) spread through the entire school at the speed of light

I can hear you thinking: law school must be different somehow, right? Well, right. Close your eyes and spend a moment thinking back to your elementary school days. Okay good, you’ve got it. Now imagine that, only add alcohol and sex. Yeah, it’s not a pretty picture.

As a public service, JD Journal offers these additional reasons not to go to law school:

10. It’s not worth the money.

Harvard Law is going to cost you $40,000. A year. That’s more than most Americans make in salary. But it’s worth it, right? After all, you’ll end up at a top law firm, billing $1,100 an hour. Right? Right?

Or… could you get a law degree just a smidgen less prestigious for half the cost? Or an MBA degree for a quarter of the cost? Or maybe no pricey education is going to put a coat of paint on the fact that you’re a soulless academic grade-chaser with no idea what you want to do with your life? And maybe you’re too young and stupid to be making decisions that will put you, or your parents, in hundreds of  thousands of dollars in debt?

11. You are training to be evil.

The Law is meant to be a noble calling. You are basically the defender of civilization against crime, anarchy and injustice. And if you practice by the principles laid down by our greatest legal minds, you will be a guardian of justice for our society.

You’ll also be poor. If you wanna make the big bucks, you gotta defend corporate criminals, twist the meaning of the law, and cheat, cheat cheat. Sue those who can’t afford legal representation. Appeal every decision you don’t like. And bill, bill, bill, even if it puts your client in the poorhouse. It’s the Jerome Fachers who make the big bucks, son. Leave your soul at the door.

12. Why bother?

The world’s gonna end when the Mayan Calendar runs out in 2012. Why spend all your time until then memorizing case law? Might as well try to get laid!

Via Legal Geekery.