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Usually when people are telling you that a blood-sucking fiend of the night is scouring the halls of a courthouse it is meant as an insult. In some cases it can actually be the prelude to a death threat. As a general rule, it is really not something that you want to be called.
Unless you happen to be one lawyer with a great sense of humor. Playing both on the holiday of costumes and the reputation of some members of the legal profession he chooses to come to court every October 31st as the unholy prince of the night himself, Dracula.
As it turns out Dracula has moved away from the dreary Transylvanian mountains, to a less depression location. He now stalks the halls of the Civil Court in Queens County, New York in search of fresh blood from his victims.
I know. The whole thing is rife for parody. The situation almost begs you to make a joke about it. If you need a few minutes to make one, go ahead and leave one in the comments section, or forward this to your friends with a set snarky comments added. You know that you want to.
Apparently, as immortals often do, he has gotten into the habit of showing up at the same feeding grounds every year. In an interview with a prominent law gossip blogger “Dracula†said that he began coming to court in his cape and fangs about five or six years ago. He did it the first time as a gag and the people in the court responded so well that the count decided to make an annual appearance. So apparently the unnaturally daylight sparkling teen vamps of the Twilight series are not the only ones with an avid fan following.
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Apparently Dracula is allowed to argue motion and appear in bench trials in his formal cape and medallion. Neither the judge nor the opposing council raised an objection. The only person who did not have a change to object is the client. Now, we cannot speak for the confidence level of that particular client, but few people would be happy having a serious legal matter settled for them by a man wearing plastic fangs. Truly it must have been an act of faith.
In case you are wondering what kind of law Dracula practices it is neither of the obvious choices, wrongful death or international real estate, but instead he is a specialist in No-Fault collections for medical providers. Who knows, maybe be gets paid in packets of plasma instead of cold hard cash. It would explain why there are no bodies with suspicious neck holes showing up annually in vicinity of Queens.
This type of law is needed because a number of No-Fault insurers have adopted the policy of cutting off patient benefits after a very brief exams of injured patients. Drac’s job is to get them back the coverage and the care that they need. So either he’s finally seen the light, metaphorically, and become the good guy, or he just wants his victim pool to stay fresh.
