Guest Post by April Masini, AskApril.com
Huma Abedin, the wife of sexting political candidate Anthony Weiner, is being compared to Hilary Clinton, wife of former president and dress-stainer Bill Clinton. These women are both bright, educated and successful on their own, yet when faced with marital humiliation, they’ve each stood by their man. In fact, Weiner would be looking at the classified ads for jobs if it weren’t for Abedin’s public support. One can only wonder what goes on behind closed doors.
Why do these women stay with their men?
There are many different reasons that people marry, but when you see a power couple, where both people in the relationship are striving for the gold ring, rest assured that what’s keeping them together is not companionship and wanting to raise a family together. These people feel that their spouses bring something to their own, personal lives and career goals that they couldn’t get from a “safer” man.
Example: Hilary Clinton knew that it would be a lot easier for her to achieve her own personal and career goals inside the spotlight her husband’s political career afforded her. Could she have made a presidential run as successfully on her own? Doubtful. And Ms. Abedin, whose career is not well known to the general public, will gain publicity and a sympathetic fan base (many of those fans will also be registered voters) for her own career aspirations.
What about women who stay with their men and don’t have their own career goals?
What I can tell you as a relationship expert is that bad boys — in all their forms — are not new, and the women who seek them out, marry them and stand by them, do so today, and will continue to do so because there’s something in it for them that these women are attracted to.
What is it?
* Power — Wives of politicians have access and entree to jobs, society and a lifestyle that those who are not married to political figures do not. If this sounds like a throw-back to the Mad Menstyle 1950s life, it’s not. This segment of society has never disappeared. It’s just stayed in the kitchen.
* Status — There is a certain status that bad boys in politics, academics, sports and entertainment all carry with them. How else would mobsters get such great women? More than (ahem) shoe size or the car he drives, status and power is what draws women to men. And even with the embarrassment of Weiner’s sexting scandal, he remains relevant — and so does his wife.
* Fame by association and sympathy as residual association. Women scorned all over the world are rooting for these wives of sexters, dress stainers, cheaters and basically men behaving badly.
Are Hilary and Huma the next Thelma and Louise? Yes, they very well could be. If, that is, they don’t become hardened and strident, and instead, show their soft sides that allow us to see underdogs rising. But with a nod to Thelma & Louise, let’s hope that the only cliffs Huma & Hilary drive over are metaphorical ones.
Who is the opposite of Huma and Hilary in politics?
Sarah Palin. She didn’t marry her husband because of his political savvy or his trophy husband status. And if she found out he was sexting or staining dresses like Weiner or Clinton, as Huma and Hilary have, she would do what many other female, registered voters like her would do in the same situation — she’d go moose-hunting. At home.
Nicknamed “the new millennium’s Dear Abby” by the media, April Masini writes the critically acclaimed ‘Ask April’ advice column and answers reader’s questions on the free Ask April advice forum. Author of four books, including Date Out Of Your League (TurnKey Press, 0-9746763-0-6) and Think & Date Like A Man (iUniverse, 0-595-37466-2), April has been interviewed for over 2,700 articles and opinion pieces, radio and television shows, including those on FOX, ABC, CBS, MSN, Telemundo and Univision — New York Times, New York Daily News, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Cosmopolitan, Maxim and USA Today.