Summary: Find out what the most important things you should look for in a life partner are in this article.
With online dating and a plethora of dating apps, it can be hard to discern what you’re really looking for in a partner. It’s easy to be swayed by funny commentary, good looks, job, height or, let’s be honest, a cute dog. With so many options out there, rather than narrowing things down, we often swipe right for anyone who catches our fancy. Then we’re left with weird email conversations or disappointing first dates.
Do you know what you’re really looking for? Because being photogenic or having the ability to write a witty profile paragraph isn’t everything when it comes to an offline relationship.
If you feel like you’re in a dating rut, it might be because you aren’t asking yourself the hard questions about what important qualities would make a good life partner for you. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but who do you want by your side when things get tough?
Here are a few key traits to look for in narrowing down what you want in a partner:
- Relatable life experiences. You might not want to admit it, but like attracts like. Not necessarily personality wise, but we’re drawn to people who understand us and what our lives are like. You’re more likely to relate to someone who has had a similar upbringing to you or currently lives a similar lifestyle. Common experiences bring people together on a different level.
- Similar values and goals. What is most important to you? Where do you see yourself in the future? What do you value the most in life? Forget hobbies or careers. Finding someone who values the same thing, like altruism, family, self-improvement, integrity, or honesty, can create a lasting relationship. If you both have the same end-goals in mind, then you’re less likely to have conflicts that you can’t get past.
- Kindness. I know, I know. “Kindness” doesn’t exactly sound sexy or exciting, but let’s be honest: how do you want your partner to treat you and the people around you? Genuine kindness means that this person really cares about those around them and treats people with care and respect, including you.
- Similar travel preferences. This may seem arbitrary, but it’s always been said that the first trip together is the true test of a relationship. Travel reflects how you both live life on a larger scale – whether you like to go with the flow or have things planned and how you work together when tough or unfamiliar situations arise. Do you travel together seamlessly, or do you want to push them into a pond halfway through the trip?
- Balance. We all want to find that person who matches our personality perfectly. It can be difficult, but it makes a huge difference when you find someone who compliments you and you do the same for them. Does this person make you want to be better in various parts of your life? Are they a calm force when you’re anxious or vice versa? While similar core values are important, different personalities create a strong team.